Wednesday, February 08, 2006
Feed your creative beast
Laini set the wheels in motion with her posts about daydreams and words to live by. Later I checked in with chestofdrawers and was lifted from my chair by the wonderful post about how more women need to take that time for themselves and let the beautiful insides out. Chasing the tag Alexandra started I found some amazing blogs, a long reading list and several posts about body image. “I couldn’t help but wonder,” if so many of us are in such similar places, why is it we feel so alone sometimes? Then I was thankful my hubby kept encouraging me to blog, because since I’ve been here I haven’t felt so alone so often.
The school bus pulled up and the routine kicked in. The update on life in first and second grade, papers, papers, dinner and homework. Part of my 6-year-old son’s homework this week has been the result of his involvement in karate. He started in August and just loves it. It’s helped him outwardly express something he always had inside: discipline.
Where before I’d nearly have to wrestle him to get him to do homework, now he does it as best he can (and without arguing) so that it’s done and he can move on to the next thing. He’s learned through the workouts that repetition really isn’t stupid, as he used to say, that it really does make you stronger, whether its school work or a workout.
And with karate it’s not just physical. He’s had to learn a good amount of Japanese vocabulary just to get through the workouts, as well as memorize his karate creed and now eight codes. We worked on the codes last night, and the posts I’d read yesterday echoed in my head.
A person’s heart is the same as heaven and earth.
The blood circulating is similar to the moon and the sun.
The manner of drinking and spitting is neither hard nor soft.
A person’s unbalance is the same as weight.
The body should be able to change direction at all times.
The time to strike is when the opportunity presents itself.
The eye must see all sides.
The ear must listen in all directions.
I was raised by parents who always did "what you're supposed to do" ... always strived to be perceived as "normal." (Think of J.K. Rowling’s Dursleys, without the mean streak.) Needless to say, dream chasing and tightrope walking were discouraged. Work hard at a practical job. By a suburban house, put a big TV in it and pay your bills on time. That was “what you’re supposed to do.” That’s what’s normal. So I grew up to be a creative beast caged by a hunger for validation.
I had my three babies in the space of 35 months. There was weight to lose, but I was always so tired. This pattern went on for five years. A few months back I realized that I also always looked tired, which made me feel even more tired still … as well as a bunch of other things. It was time to break out of the rut. I’d tried many times before (just ask hubby, who is always there to spur me on). This time, I was going to do it. The first step is always a doozy, but you have to plod on.
So in October I started doing 30 minutes of exercise three or four times a week. I felt better, so I wanted to look even better. Two weeks ago I totally changed my hair. (Why is that always such an exciting thing?) I felt better still, so I put new energy into blogging ... and look at all I've found and how you inspire me!
Feeding the creative beast is satiating the hunger for validation. (I don’t need that so much because I like myself more.) And isn't it funny how, when you work toward self-fulfillment you're able to give more to the people around you? Striving for fulfillment isn’t really that selfish … it allows you to offer things you might not have known you had to share.
Sure, I still have my canine mood swings, but the pendulum isn’t so wild. I’ve been able to approach my kids with greater patience and acceptance because I’m more peaceful inside.
A person’s heart is the same as heaven and earth.
With the physical muscle stronger, I felt energized. With new connections to my creativity and the creativity in so many others, I feel invigorated.
Instead of plodding, I feel like dancing.
On another note, ditto to what you said about connecting to people through these blogs and not feeling alone -- it's tremendous!
It cost nothing to be creative and it's in side each one of us.
Whether it's the doodle on the edge of a piece of paper during a meeting or a concerto in D# written over 5 months. They both serve the same purpose. They free our minds and express our realities.
Dance on girl!
Andy ... you have a blogosphere awaiting that symphony.
Liz Elayne ... thanks for stopping by! I think I'll put some Glen Miller on now as dancing always makes my chores go faster ...
Amazing post!
I have 3 kids too, but it took me 42 months, and I know how hard it is to keep things going and give everyone what they need without forgetting about yourself. My parents were similar to yours and I also felt that beast within - now we have the chance to let our children move, create, grow, in whatever direction they want to. My parents were held back by so many things - being in a new country, memories of growing up after a war when everyone was poor and hungry, plus all those religious pressures. I am so grateful that we have more freedom nowadays and although I live in a small village where a lot of people like to think they have the right to judge, I feel strong enough to live my life the way I want to. The contact with all these wonderful people here who are moving forward together has certainly made me stronger and not so isolated.
I actually went to post here on Friday and just before I was going to hit "publish" the power fizzled and then went out. Anyhow, by the time I had power again I wasn't feeling like re-typing. But I'll give it a shot now :)
Basically, I just wanted to restate how tremendously wide-reaching the positive effects of karate will be for someone (especially a young child or teen). The dojo I joined was big into teaching humility/modesty to their students as well as rigorous training & discipline. By the time I was an instructor there I'd like to think I was teaching the same to others. Suffice it to say that all of the positive qualities I learned there overlapped into my schooling (discipline) and in daily life to this day (self-confidence without arrogance).
Anyhow, karate, in combination with having a supportive family will do AMAZING things for your son!
Best,
Jim
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