booandbunny

I miss him when he goes to school, more than I thought I would. I enjoy my freedom when they are all at school, more than I thought I would. I’ve been trying to do a few things I have been putting off and it has felt good, but it keeps me from the keys, even from my journal, and I am going to have to devote some time to writing the whispers out of my head soon: The Monsters for Sunday Scribblings … The time I’ve spent with my own face … The realization that time alone is integral to a centered life … What I’ve discovered in my first month taking karate classes … But there are things between me and the keys, pulling me away from my pen and I’m looking to balance my four hours alone so that I can finish what needs to be done and still do some things I want to do. A blog stop this morning got me thinking about lists, so I decided making one might help.

Ten things keeping me from the keys

1. Cruising online freelance markets is painstakingly tedious and seemingly non-productive, but I shall press on. I think a big problem I have is that some postings are so vague as to seem shady and I need to stuff my suspicions in a sack and take a chance.

2. Suddenly, I am the person all the neighbors call when they have a complaint or need something done. After years with the homeowners association it’s time to find somebody else for this job, so I have to get all the papers in order—ready to hand to my replacement.

3. July and August were busier than they seemed. There was the silly daily fun, as well as the traveling, which is what really surprised me. We did more than I expected! Then, when that was done, we organized the neighborhood block party and went to a baseball game with people from school and managed a few dinners with friends then had to get the clothes and supplies and visit school and we started karate. WHAM! The last six weeks of summer … DONE! … and nary a word did I write about it.

4. The new school year brings a tidal wave of papers home that I dutifully sift through, sign and return: health inventories, transportation information, emergency contacts and volunteer forms. Whew. But Second and Third grade are on a regular homework schedule in this, the first full week of classes. Kindergarten will likely start homework before the end of September. It’s a balancing act. And with someone going to karate four nights a week we have to stick to a timetable. Forming new, good habits can be stressful, but we’re getting it done. The first few weeks of a new schedule are always tough.

5. A month ago I stared karate in the evenings, but I find myself on the sofa dozing as soon as the kids are in bed. This is costing me valuable creative time! Have to get up and keep moving after they are in bed.

6. The beginning of the school year has also forced me to get in gear for the class we teach at church. Last year I did my last-minute thing at least 10 times. I don’t want to do that again! So I’ve been getting all of that organized and ready to start in two weeks.

7. I have too many ideas write now. (YIPES! Re-reading I find this fascinating typo!) Boo and Bunny need to grow older … I have a notebook of crooked scribble on this somewhere. Short stories on travelers whisp through my brain and I fear they will be lost, so I suffer from an internal nagging that forces me to eventually just shutdown when really, I should start a new notebook. I’ve got some things I want to try to put together as samples of potentially marketable products. And a plethora of crafty creations pushing at the insides of my fingertips, trying to burst out if only I would allow them. Instead I press on with my scrapbooking and will continue to do so until it feels like a job.

8. I’m thinking of entering a local art show/competition. If I do I’ll try to post a picture of the work here. It was a theme that just jumped out at me when I read about it and so I’m trying to put something together … we’ll see how it turns out. I’ve never attempted anything like this before, but am having fun.

9. The house is ready for some change-of-season love. It doesn’t hurt that we’ve scheduled a bulky trash pick up for next Wednesday. These deadlines always spur us to action! (garage, yard, basement) If we work really hard Saturday, maybe we can take in the air show Sunday and go see the baby elephant at the zoo Monday. Of course, none of these things is writing!

10. I found myself with no desire to read. I was bookless for about a month and haven’t been as good as I should be about visiting other people’s blogs. It seems, looking back, that I was so bummed out about losing that job that I didn’t even have the energy to engage in a fantasy world or the desire to leave comments out here. (Everything kept coming out with this odd tone that I didn’t feel comfortable posting.) But shutting myself out of other people’s writing might be a part of my own shut down. I am forcing myself to try to read a few pages a day. And, while I’m still not leaving many comments, I am checking in and catching up. Back on the horse. Giddyup!

// posted by HoBess @ 8/31/2006 11:01:00 AM